Think of a charming person you know. Aside from expressing a buoyant personality, chances are he or she draws upon the range of social skills outlined in this book—skills that anyone can learn with practice, such as active listening, making eye contact, and projecting curiosity and enthusiasm. The charmers may not even say much, but they leave others feeling amused and engaged.
The basic idea is that if you practice the behaviors and habits of mind that put you and others at ease, over time they become natural and effortless. It’s not a new notion—Aristotle advocated it in ancient Athens and William James updated it for the emerging lexicon of psychology a hundred years ago. The Power of Charm’s coauthors, both California-based consultants, keep it simple and practical for a business readership.
Chapters are, if not charming, then short and focused, spiced with exercises and little anecdotes about effective charm or charm gone wrong. Social cues like eye contact, head nods, body language, and verbal reassurances are described. Though some of it is predictable—don’t fold your arms or slump in your chair when someone else is talking—active listening is a skill rarely mentioned in business books. The chapter “The Eloquence of Silence” says to, in effect, shut up now and then and trust that the conversation is becoming more meaningful, not less. “Pauses allow listeners to have an inner dialogue with you. . . . The more inner dialogue you inspire, the stronger your connection with your listeners will be.”
Though we question the book’s promise that “you will be paid more and promoted faster” if you learn some charm, these skills outlined in this book are often key to career effectiveness.